A process is described for preparing alkylene oxide-adducted hydrocarbyl amides having less than 2 wt % of amine by-products by a) reacting a C4-C30 fatty acid or fatty acid lower alkyl ester with a mono- or di-hydroxy hydrocarbyl amine to form a hydrocarbyl amide; b) reacting the hydrocarbyl amide with alkylene oxide; and c) extracting the product of b) with water, acidic water, or water-containing inorganic salts or a combination thereof at a temperature from about 5° C. to 95° C. to yield an alkylene oxide-adducted hydrocarbyl amide having less than 2 wt % of amine by-products.