Provided are a tool exchange device and a tool exchange system that enable management of a coupling state according to a tool to be fixed. A tool exchange device including a male member to be detachably attached to an apparatus side and a female member to be detachably attached to a tool side includes: a proximity sensor provided in the male member; and a target provided in the female member, the target corresponding to the proximity sensor, and the target is provided in the female member in such a manner that a distance between the target and the proximity sensor in a state in which the male member and the female member are coupled together is adjustable.