Systems and methods for creating and joining directories of contacts are provided. A method includes receiving, from a first user device associated with a first user, a first request to create the private directory of contacts, the first request including a directory joining criterion; creating the private directory of contacts; receiving, from a second user device associated with a second user, a second request to join the private directory of contacts; in response to determining that the second user meets the directory joining criterion, adding the second user to the private directory of contacts; and in response to determining that the second user does not meet the directory joining criterion, adding an incoming request, indicative of the second request, to a list of incoming requests of the first user.